It was wonderful to see people again who for 30 years have been frozen in my mind by their yearbook picture! I talked with people I had never spoken to in high school but the conversation came easy because we had something so powerful in common. My life in Japan has never felt very connected with the continuum of the life I have built since then. This reunion allowed me to weave those dangling threads into the fabric of the life I live now. Tim Carr's talk about Third Culture Kids was a real "a-ha" moment for me--putting words to a feeling I have long had about those ASIJ years but could never articulate. It was wonderful to have my husband there to meet many of my friends and classmates from that time and to hear the Third Culture Kids phenomenon explained. We both came to understand a part of my growing up in a new way.
 
Spending the whole weekend together allowed us to build deep connections that one event of a few hours couldn't do. Thank you, Brent Ware, for your amazing generosity in bringing us together. The service on Sunday morning was especially moving. Thank you, Lisa DeYoung Jastram, for organizing such a lovely gathering which brought us to a tender and poignant place of remembering our departed friends and family and also gave us a chance to reflect on the blessings of being reunited with old friends to both to share memories and build new friendship going forward. In that moment I felt all those who couldn't be there with us "hovering 'round".

 
A reunion, especially a high numbered one, is a strange concept to wrap your head around. First of all, I'm too young to be 30 years out of high school. And I'm definitely too young to find the kids I used to hang out with approaching grandparent territory! And then there's that pesky question of whether ASIJ ever really truly happened, or was it just a trip to the amusement park for so many years? And that scarier question of whether those kids I used to know will be scrutinizing and judging and comparing their metrics to mine, and will I be found wanting? But somehow I made up my mind to attend, and I'm very happy that I did.
 
The Nashville Reunion weekend was a whirl of one amazing event after another, a complete sensory overload of environment and experience, all overlaid with the emotional highs of meeting and reconnecting with people with who had disappeared off my radar screen 30 years ago. Saturday night was beyond description. And then Sunday morning, with the Service of Remembrance, was the most fitting possible way to end the event - the reminder of what was genuinely important was exactly what we needed to carry away from the weekend as we made our ways back to our normal lives.
 
Renewing old friendships that had long-since lapsed was a huge part of the event for me. But an equally huge part was becoming friends with people I hadn't gotten to know well enough (or at all) back in the day. And it was sobering to discover that people I thought I'd known back then were not as uncomplicated as the little boxes I'd categorized them in would indicate. People are more complex than we sometimes realize, and it's careless and patronizing to forget that. Your high school can help you grow years after the fact, if you let it.
 
There was a tremendous outpouring of warmth and generosity of spirit from all who attended. It would have been a great experience if it had happened in a gym decorated with streamers and a DJ. Having it take place at Brent's house, farm, and studios with a band full of rock royalty made it just that much more magical.
 
The reunion helped me realize that I really have to go back to Japan and revisit the people and places that brought me here. Maybe this coming summer...? My time at ASIJ meant too much to me to allow myself to neglect the memories for so long. Which is why the reunion was an event not to be missed - it served as a reminder of why the time in Tokyo mattered so much. It was a chance to make new memories with the people who share many of my most interesting old ones. Can't wait for the next event!

 
When I arrived at the Best Western, the first two people I ran into were Paul Swain and Tim Turner, so we all instantly hit it off and I knew it was going to be a good time no matter what. Tim and his wife, Bev and I had some beers before the bus came and took us to Brent's place and then I was overwhelmed with jitters...I didn't know any of these people and they probably don't know me either...uh oh!
 
Then I got to the mansion after the bus fought through football traffic (like a salmon swimming upstream) and I sort of clung to Tim and Bev and Paul since I "knew" them. It didn't take but 10 minutes after being graciously greeted at the door by the Wares to start recognizing old friends...first, Anne Ludlow , whom I had not seen since we ran into each other several times in Boston during college days, then there was Grace Fukuda (Berman)...a very special friend I had not been in touch with since leaving Tokyo, then Paul Nagata, my best wrestling buddy whom I'd always wondered how he was and where he was, then Steve Sundberg, who was also one of my best friends from back then. He had once illustrated a children's book I wrote in Mrs. Butler's English class. He was ALWAYS so creative. Then there was Jessie Furness. whom I remembered from us being in the same confirmation class together at St. Albans Anglican church across the street from Tokyo Tower. Then I got my sushi and sat down with, Paulette (De Young), whom I remembered as this gorgeous upperclassmen girl who was always so friendly. She was sitting there with Beth Pederson, whom I remembered as being one of the best cheerleaders when I was in football. Beth and Paulette instantly made me feel welcome and then Lisa (De Young) came along... I remembered VERY well the music she and Karen Heck created in a big assembly we had during junior year. They played "House of the Rising Sun" and "Father and Son" and to this day, I think about that assembly every time I hear either of those two songs on the radio.
 
Then, Gary (Mr.) Fish loosened us all up with his great standup routine. Teachers are like parents...they tell you all their fun secrets when it's safe some 30 years after all of their antics occurred. When he was talking, he talked about his "losing cross country team", which instantly conjured up memories of my time on that team. He was a big coaching inspiration to me back then. He was another great "character builder" at that school for me. Then there was Mr. (Steve) Myers, who taught me how to do a slide rule (or else I wouldn't graduate!) and Mr. Bonneville, whom I did not immediately remember, but then it came back to me that I still had the protractor I bought for his class in my desk drawer after all these years ( the one with the Japanese writing on the sheath). And...that was just the first night.
 
Then for breakfast on Saturday, I got to sit with Mr. and Mrs. Bonneville and I heard of their adventures in Laos, where they adopted their son and daughter, Saudi Arabia, Nicaragua and Slovakia, before they finally settled down in deep south Texas. They were incredibly brave people to work in such lands at such times.
 
Then at the farm, the visiting and the fun just helped me to bond with my old friends even more and forge great new friends like Woody Sherman and Nathan Lund, whom I hadn't known really well at ASIJ. Lisa and Dave Jastram are both among those new friends I know I will cherish. I was sorry I did not get to see Dan Jastram. Dan was kind of a wrestling mentor for me. He was always better than me, but he was always a great teacher in his quiet sort of way. He had written me a wonderful note in my '73 yearbook that I sometimes still look at for inspiration. (I'm sure he probably doesn't remember it.) I had a great time riding the horses. That's another experience I did not have for some 10 years, since Sheila and I went horse-back riding in the Blue Ridge in Virginia when we first were married.
 
Then Saturday evening was a wonderful whirlwind of a night. The dancing, the speech by our new headmaster ( a GREAT guy!), watching Brent Ware in action delivering his wonderful gift to everyone and then receiving our token gift with true appreciation. Then, I was instantly on American Bandstand with cameras rolling and members from several bands I listened to in college (Wet Willie, 38 Special, Marshall Tucker) all playing live before my very eyes. I was grinning the whole time.
 
I had a wonderful conversation that night with Anne Ludlow Kuzara and Dave Kuzara and found out that Dave is facing the same challenges I had faced in 1996 when my Dad had terminal cancer. I got to pray for Dave the next morning at the wonderful memorial service that Lisa and Marcia and Anne and Irene and Nan and Donna had had for all of us. That morning I was very glad the Mr. Moyer issue was brought up, because I had not previously heard much about that except bits and pieces and I am sure that was a painful thing for several people in the room. Appreciated the thoughtful (and perfect) positioning of that tragic situation.
 
Also, I did not know a lot about David De Young's battle with AIDS and the story about that really touched me and the (AIDS) quilt moved me immensely. Then, I was in tears when we were given the opportunity to honor the ASIJ parents and I got to put a tsuru (paper crane) on the tree for my dad, who was my mentor and my hero during my Japan years and really, always up until he passed in January, 1996. I was a bit shy at the microphone, but I wish I had said that on that morning. Thanks for providing us with that wonderful setting for prayer and emotion.
 
Finally, the last brunch, and I got to catch up a bit with Nan Setterholm (VanSandt). She is a wonderful person and has just as great of a personality as she did back in school. Then...more jolting emotional news...Mr. Okada was gravely ill. I remembered very vividly, a dinner at his house the night before an away football game at Zama. He explained to all of us ignorant kids all about the internment camps for people of Japanese decent in the US and his bitter experiences there during World War II. That was a lesson in life I will never forget.
 
Finally, it was time to say goodbye and take the last round of group pictures and exchange emails and phone numbers. During that last flurry, I said hello for the first time to Paul Kidder, my JV football buddy. In a brief 5 minutes, I found out that he lives in Atlanta right down the road from me. I didn't get to meet his wife and kids, though, who were sitting right there. Paul and I just had lunch 2 days ago here in Atlanta and I learned that his wife and I went to Tufts University, so there's another great connection made as a result of this wonderful weekend.
 
What a magical weekend...